She did the best she could

“I thought you were dead”.

This proclamation brought the much desired silence at the table.

“The only reason I came back was because I thought you were dead”, her son clarified.

She had wanted silence, but not this kind, because now she could hear thoughts she had successfully buried for years—and these were not righteous thoughts!

She’d given her days to ministry, and had helped bring hope to countless families.

All that time away from home eventually began to tell on her family.

She blamed herself sometimes—a preacher’s kid. Married to a preacher. She would have known better!

But she did do her best.

Even though it seemed like it, she did not intentionally abandon her children while catering to the needs of other families.

And she did come back home to be with them—you’d think that would count for something!

So when this son had left home in his college days and promised not to return home until his parents were dead, they had put it down to youthful delinquency at first.

Then as months turned to years, they were certain it was an attack of the enemy.

They did everything they could to make peace.

They prayed all kinds of prayers.

And when they had learned he was coming home for the yearly thanksgiving gathering they always had as a family, they were grateful for answered prayers.

He came with his wife and children—family they hadn’t seen. Ever.

But things began to turn when he found out his siblings had tricked him, with the help of his wife!

Although he no longer cared that much for family, she didn’t want her children to grow up without family. So she’d reached out to his siblings for help. He had been in touch with them, and she’d met them once or twice.

It might have been an answer to their prayers all these years, but it didn’t look like one he was thankful for.

And she was having a hard time keeping those not-righteous thoughts at bay.

So what if they weren’t the perfect parents!

They were people trying to do the best they could—and that should count for something!

She said a short prayer, and broke the silence “Son you do not have to be here if you don’t want to. You’d be always welcome, and we’d always be praying for you, but if you let those same words out of your mouth again, in the same order, and addressed to any of us, we’d be praying for quick recovery at your hospital bed!”

She didn’t even know what that meant, but no child of hers would disrespect her in her own house because they’ve perceived some form of shortcoming in her.

She was after all, a person trying to find her way, and doing the best she could.

The echoes of “Amen” around the table was like balm to her wounded spirit, and the wide toothed grin of the offending son’s wife was sufficient assurance that God answers prayers—and that she hadn’t gone and lost her own good mind!

Dinner was taking too long!

She had a daughter she needed to catch up with!


Read the second part here.

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32 thoughts on “She did the best she could”

  1. God is so good! How ironic I came upon your post. Just tonight we were talking with friends and how as parents we try our very best with what we know at that moment in time. Yes, we make mistakes. It wasn’t until each of us had children of our own that we realized so did our parents. I have found when we adopt the thought that everyone is doing the best they can life is a little sweeter.

    Thank you so much for sharing with Grace and Truth. My name is Maree, I am a brand new host, and I look forward to reading more of your posts in the future. I loved it.

    • Thanks for visiting, Maree. And yes, God is good, all the time! It really does make life a little sweeter to remember that everyone is doing the best they can. Blessings to you.

  2. Yes, thank God for grace, and growth over time……. I tell my husband, “We can’t change the past, but we can go forward determined to be the BEST (grand-parents, and in-laws) that we can be. The past does not define our future.”

  3. Intriguing post Boma! Yes most parents do the absolute best they can with the life experience they have at the time & yes we all would do things differently in certain situations in Hindsight but we don’t have that at the time as its hind sight! Don’t you agree…

    But as Maree commented above, if we realize none of us are perfect & we do try our best… then we can give others that same allowance & forgiveness & get on with loving significant others in our lives.
    Life is too short…& we have been forgiven much by our Heavenly Father ~ who are we not to do the same…

    You are most welcome to drop by & have a quiet time of reflection with your favorite beverage & tasty treat.

    • So true about hindsight, Jennifer. Plus, when we forgive, we let go of burdens that might hold us down unnecessarily. Thanks for visiting. Blessings to you.

  4. I always say about my parents they did the best they could with what they had at the time. Yes, they could have done so much better Mom was a spoiled only child and Dad was a spoiled youngest. But life was how it was and when they did pass they both knew I loved them even though they weren’t perfect.

  5. Boma, I wanted to let you know I am going to feature your post tomorrow on my website. I am one of the hosts for Grace & Truth Link-up. I hope you will hop on over tomorrow and share that you were featured. I loved your post.

  6. What a great story! I hope there is more to come. There is such emotion just thinking about the parents and how they prayed and how their son seemed ungrateful, etc. Thanks so much for linking up with us at the #LMMLinkup this week.
    Blessings to you!

  7. I would love to know more of this story. I hope this son found peace and let go of bitterness. I hope he could embrace the truth that each parent does the best they can in that moment and that he found hope in Jesus as the only One who can get this all right the first time. Thank you for sharing this with us at #MomentsofHope!

    Blessings and smiles,

    • Hi Lori. Hopefully, it won’t be too long before the concluding Part of the story is finished. Thanks for hosting, and for visiting. Blessings to you.

  8. I love the story she did the best she could. I am struggling with grief for a daughter who was just dx with emotional regulation disorder and entered an outpatient program at a nearby hospital. I feel responsible and am living with grief right now , but am seeking help.
    I will try and remember that I did the best I could.

  9. As my adult daughter and I reminisced about her childhood and my parenting, we discussed some of my mistakes in parenting. I told her how sorry I was when I didn’t allow her to play soccer or when I was tired some days and not as attentive. I loved her reply, “Mom, it’s okay. You were the best mom ever, mistakes and all. And I’m sure I will make my own mistakes, but hopefully, my daughter, as I feel, will know that I love her no matter what.” As parents, we will not be perfect, but we can love the best we can. 🙂 Love covers a multitude of sins.


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